The Square Peg

The only reason we have a kitchen is because it came with the house. :) I don't like to cook and I despise baking (except brownies). I do, however, like to eat.  Anybody want to volunteer to buy this cake mold and make something yummy for me? Pretty please? I'll say nice things about you in my blog if you do. :)

So I was cutting up an avocado for my sandwich a while ago and noticed the sticker on it read "green acorn". After briefly wondering why an A.C.O.R.N. sticker was on my avocado, I realized what it was really from: the green acorn squash I bought at the store yesterday. Upon closer examination, I discovered the following:

My spaghetti squash had an avocado sticker on it
my green acorn had a "lite slimcado" sticker on it
my butternut squash had a spaghetti squash sticker on it
and my 'lite' avocado had a butternut squash sticker on it.

Based on my past experience with things like Aqua Reefer, Epileptic Testicles and Wordless Wednesday, I suspect this is the work of the inked and mischievous Drewby. If you see him, beware. He'll mess with your food & food lists. Don't say I didn't warn you. Oh, for those who don't know, here's what he looks like.

This is kind of a piggyback to the character vs talent post.

I've been thinking about celebrities and the expectations we have of them and wonder if it's possible we might be a little off base. Take Michael Phelps, for instance.

A while back I heard a lot of people talking about how disappointed they were to find out he had used drugs. I'm not condoning his drug use; like so many others, I assumed he followed the rules set forth by the Olympic Committee and was drug-free. And I feel badly for the kid; he made a dumb choice, the public found out about it, and he'll probably suffer consequences for his choice for a long time. BUT...

I never heard Michael say he was anything other than a competitive swimmer.

So, now I'm wondering why do we often assign certain morals to a person who has a particular kind of gift or talent? Isn't that presumptuous? I'm not talking about drugs because in the case of sports, it's pretty clear why the standards are set the way they are. I'm talking about other moral issues. Is it fair to expect someone who is clean-cut, a certain age, highly disciplined, or interviews well on TV to have a particular moral code of conduct? I know we hope people have certain standards because many times we long for a hero, and are inspired by people who raise (or set) the bar. But isn't it true that we sometimes put things on people unfairly by expecting them to be at a place they're not?

What if instead of having great expectations of people, we put grace expectations on people. What do you think?

Actually, it's August 24th's big thing, but I wanted to put it up anyway. Enjoy...

Several years ago when I worked day shift and Brian worked nights, we started going on a date every Saturday morning. Back then we'd drive to Starbucks in Macon (at 30 minutes away, it was the closest one) to enjoy some coffee and conversation before going to lunch. Since we were little more than passing ships during the week, this was a great chance for us to reconnect, refocus and re-energize our relationship. We'd tell each other the details of the week that got pushed by the wayside and talk about the things coming up on the horizon of life. Our boys were old enough that they didn't call us on the cell phone every 20 minutes (probably because they didn't care where we were or what we were doing) and the uninterrupted time together was heavenly.

Brian was eventually moved back to day shift but our Saturday dates had proven to be too valuable to give up. A couple years ago, my happy place opened a store in Warner Robins (I'm pretty sure my purchases pay Starbucks' electric bill.) and we changed our game plan a little: we started going to Hardees for breakfast and then to Starbucks.

We've invited Ryan and his girlfriend Sam to join us a few times and now it has turned into a regular thing. And Drew's scheduled has changed, so he's been hooking up with us too. And even though our Saturday date is bigger, louder, and more lively than when it began five years ago, it definitely still qualifies as heavenly.

 I swiped this off my friend Lori's blog...you can find her blog here. Yes, we use the same template. Great minds, you know. LOL

T-Mobile Mom to Mom Quiz: "


A couple of the questions were difficult to answer because I would've done two of the choices but could only mark one of them. It was also hard since I didn't send my kids to school and never dealt with a few of the hypothetical situations. Fun nonetheless.

It's interesting how people attempt to mask their pain. Many display their hurt in the form of loud, bitter, or harsh anger. But sometimes hurt manifests itself in a different way.

When my feelings get hurt it's almost always because I feel personally rejected in some way. And apathy is the mask I'm tempted to wear to cover those hurt feelings because it seems easier to try not to care than to confront and work through them. Whereas anger is often passionate, apathy is passive. I'm not a passive person by any stretch, and "passionate" is the word consistently used to describe me by people who know me really well. Therefore it's interesting to me that when I'm hurt, I have a tendency to lean toward passivity and basically 'go gray'. 

The area where I'm most likely to feel rejected in life is with regard to my relationships. This is probably because I've always had a keen appreciation for friendships and have never taken a person's presence in my life for granted. Due to my being a military brat who married an Air Force guy, my whole life has consisted of moving to a new place, meeting new people, forming friendships and moving away. So when I feel that someone doesn't place the same value on our friendship that I do, I feel rejected. And it is here that I find myself depressed and tempted to become apathetic toward people in order to avoid those same feelings in the future.

But passion can only lie dormant for so long. That's what makes it a passion. It's also what makes me...well, me. I can't not care about people for very long. I tried. I discovered I was more miserable expending the energy it took to remain apathetic than to work through hurt feelings. Being passionate is just easier, despite the fact that it makes me feel more vulnerable. So I'll find a way to embrace the vulnerability in order to preserve my passionate nature. And I'll reject apathy. I'll resist the temptation to wander through the gray into the darkness. I'll forge through the lighter shades of gray until I reach the light.

So basically I'm saying I'm passionate about not being apathetic. LOL Yet another facet of the square peg's mojo I'm learning to embrace.

Long live the Altoid! =)

I was talking with a friend recently who was telling me about a confusing situation she had with an acquaintance. Basically, my friend met someone at a conference who turned out to be one of her neighbors. They hit it off big time at the conference and my friend thought she had just entered a new friendship. But ever since the conference, her neighbor hasn't done anything to keep the door to the relationship open. She hasn't closed it, but it seems she only wants to play it 'safe' by communicating on social networks rather than in person.

My friend knew some of the neighbor's background and said her neighbor was still nursing a wound from a previous relationship that left her shattered, confused, and numb. My friend and I ended our discussion on this topic by concluding that some people (like her neighbor) only expose themselves to others to a certain degree and then pull back in order to avoid further rejection.

Have you ever done this? I have. I've warmed up to people only to later stop them from getting too close because I was afraid they wouldn't like me after they got to know me better. Or because someone else rejected me and I wanted to avoid the same thing from happening again.

Even although we've successfully avoided rejection, haven't we also avoided intimacy? And while playing it safe avoids potential pain and vulnerability, intimacy can't be substituted with anything else. One of the advantages of having intimate friendships is that we have a soft place to fall. And where would we be without those when we're in the depths of despair or just want somebody to shoot straight with us when we need advice? Yes, someone may hurt us if we put ourselves out there. In fact, sooner or later, someone will hurt or disappoint us. But even that brings a new opportunity for us to experience growth. And isn't that what we ultimately want: to grow and move forward rather than stagnating all alone?

Man, am I ever glad it's football season. I. Have. Missed. It.
It feels like the off season was the longest in the history of all off seasons. Yes, I like using hyperbole on occasion to express my feelings. Deal with it. LOL

I hope TN has an awesome season and kills their competition. Even Georgia. But especially Florida. Oh, how I despise Florida. And Steve Spurrier, even though he's not coaching the Gators anymore.

Saturdays are once again perfect.

When was the last time you went on a recon mission? You know what I mean…you heard a juicy bit of gossip but didn't get the whole scoop, so you decided to run a ‘recon mission’ to find out more.

Like the time your co-worker suddenly resigned his position, citing 'personal reasons' for his departure and you started asking around to find why he really left, even though his decision to leave didn't affect your job at all. Yeah...that's running recon.

Or the time you heard your former pastor was caught looking at porn and might be fired so you called one of the deacons in your former church to express your 'concern' and desire to 'pray' for your pastor...even though you haven't spoken to him in over 3 years. Guess what? Yup...recon.

How about when a friend tells you another friend is spreading rumors about you and your boyfriend? Instead of getting a play-by-play from the repeater, what would happen if you employed the Matthew 18 approach to handle this situation? Don’t hide behind the mask you wear and talk to everybody else about the situation except the parties you should be talking to.

When you’ve been in the presence of someone as they spoke ill of someone else (not in the room), did you keep silent? Or did you gently point out that the conversation wasn’t appropriate? Did you come to the defense of the one being torn down or did you participate by agreeing, adding your own first-hand knowledge, or did you spread the poison further by making up new stories? I don't know about you, but I need to work on this part (not the new stories; the other stuff).

When was the last time you restored someone?

Everyone reading this knows what I'm talking about and everyone knows it's wrong. But just in case you need a little scripture:

Troublemakers start fights; gossips break up friendships.
Proverbs 16:28

He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.
Proverbs 17:9
Did you realize you were separating friends when you talked about them?

Live creatively, friends. If someone falls into sin, forgivingly restore him, saving your critical comments for yourself. You might be needing forgiveness before the day's out. Stoop down and reach out to those who are oppressed. Share their burdens, and so complete Christ's law. If you think you are too good for that, you are badly deceived.
Galatians 6:1-3

As a ring of gold in a pig’s snout is a woman who shows no discretion.
Proverbs 11:22
Sidebar: It's not just women who need to work on this. I know plenty of men need to learn discretion, too.

No, not that "G spot". I'm talking about the God spot. That's the place inside every one of us that can only be satisfied by His presence. The place where nothing else will do. Nothing.

You can try to anesthesize the pain caused by its lack using drugs, food, sex, alcohol, things, people, cigarettes, power, money, knowledge, children, education, reason, adrenaline, or whatever else suits your fancy, but in the end it all comes down to one thing: it's called the God spot because He's the only One who fits in there exactly right. Substitutes are for schools, sugared soft drinks (and sometimes not even then), and athletic games, so don't waste your time and energy.

You don't have to get crazy about it. I'm not saying you have to give up everything you think is fun in order to get what I'm talking about, although it's possible your definition of fun will change. You don't have to pull out that 25 pound family Bible that's been covered in dust at your grandmomma's house since the day you were brought home from the hospital and start dragging it with you everywhere you go. You don't have to clean up, start subtracting things from your life, or adding weird things in. This isn't about measuring or comparing yourself against anyone else.


But if you're...
                          searching

                                             wondering

                                                                 thinking

                                                                                 wishing

                                                                                               hoping

                                                                                                            hurting

                                                                                                                          doubtful

                                                                                                                                           desperate

                                                                                                                                                              or ready to give up...

why not give it a shot? Just once (or just once more), fill your G spot with something real. Something organic. Something pure. Something that'll quench your thirsty soul like nothing else has or can.