The Square Peg

It has been a year since we said good-bye to our boys and got on a plane to move from Georgia, USA to Germany. That long, tearful, sob-filled group hug was absolutely heart-wrenching. Ryan was 23 and Drew was 20 but despite their adult ages, they didn't want to let us go and they held on very tightly as we hugged and said all the things you say to the people you love most when you don't know when you're going to see them again. We didn't have the boys take us to the airport; instead we chose to say good-bye on the base, outside our hotel room. The Atlanta airport was nearly two hours away and I knew it would take that long for my swollen eyes and red, splotchy face to clear up (to say I look rough when I cry is putting it mildly). Saying good-bye to them was every bit as hard as I expected and simply thinking about it a year later still brings tears to my eyes.

We had 7 months to prepare for our move overseas. And while we knew we couldn't know every way our lives would change after we moved, we were very aware of the fact that our family would never be the same again. It wasn't just that we were turning a page; we were starting a new chapter, possibly even a new book in the "Miller Time Chronicles" series. There were so many questions that were yet to be answered. Questions like: would the boys be married by the time we moved back to the States? Where would they live? Would we have any grandchildren in 4 years? Would we like living in Germany? How would it feel to live in a country that doesn't have air conditioning, even though it gets well into the 90's during the summer? Would the Germans like us? What will it be like to live in a house without either of our kids?

It has been winter in our family...winter in that many things we knew before this season were going to die in a way; winter in the sense that part of our family life was going to become dormant for a season.

If I were to make a guess based on my friends' Facebook status updates, I'd say most people think winter is dark and dreary and makes them wish for the summer weather to return. A lot of people curse winter; some have even moved to Florida or Hawaii to avoid it. But given that we have to let go of some things in order to have room in our hands to receive new things, I think we should look at winter in a new way and maybe even consider welcoming it.

I enjoy winter. I love the snow and cooler temperatures. I love sleeping with the windows open and feeling the cool air around me as I'm tucked into a warm bed under a big, billowy comforter and surrounded by pillows. I seldom want to curl up in a blanket and snuggle to watch a movie in the summer (especially not in the south), but it's almost a daily desire in the winter. I love what winter brings: spicy scented candles (nobody burns a pumpkin pie candle in June); a whirlwind of seasonal decorations; hearty soups and stews; even different colored clothing and hair (have you ever noticed most winter clothes are darker and more muted in color--and that many women put blond in their hair during the summer but go dark for winter?). I love these things even though I don't necessarily want them all year long (although, after living in the south for 17 years, I'd like to experience a season other than summer from March-November!).

During the winter, things die off or become dormant: grass, flowers, plants, etc. But just because you can't see the flower's blooms, doesn't mean it's not under the surface, waiting for the right time to pop out of the ground and beautify your life again.

A few months after we left Georgia, we found out both boys would be making us grandparents just before spring arrives. Rhody and Emma are the newest bulbs in the Miller family garden. Some of the answers to our questions are growing and being answered much sooner than we expected. LOL Others are still a mystery.

Winter can be cold and hard, but winter is like challenging seasons in our lives; it precedes spring. Spring brings new life, new hope, and new promises. But you can't have spring without going through winter first. Some winters are mild, some are extreme. But don't curse the cold or get discouraged by the dormancy of the season; hang in there and try to enjoy the unique comforts of the winter. And even if this spring isn't exactly like last spring, that doesn't mean it won't be amazing.

Embrace winter.
This post is part of the One Word at a Time blog carnival. Please go to Peter's page to read more entries and to submit one of your own.

ROUND ONE!
When we found out we were moving to Germany, I knew big changes were coming. I knew our family would never be the same again; not in a bad way, just that major evolutionary changes were on the horizon. Little did I know, nearly ten months (at the time of this writing) and two grandbabies on their way later, and voila! The changes are here!

ROUND TWO!
I'm making my way around yet another corner. That's right, you're about to witness my foray into the world of higher education. After a 25 year hiatus.

I'm taking two classes this term: German and Intro to Psych. I need a foreign language credit, so why not now? It'll help me navigate my way through Germany as well as meet a requirement for my degree. I love efficiency. I chose to take Psych because it's a subject I'm interested in.

Today was a day of firsts. The first day of the week. The first day of the month. My first day of college(!). The first time I sat in a classroom and *didn't* have to spell, pronounce or otherwise clarify my last name to a teacher. (Last time I was in school, my surname was McElyea. It wasn't a bad last name, but let's be real: you write Miller and there's no question as to how it's pronounced. Ah, it's the little things in life...LOL)

I like my professor. Her expertise and experience are quite impressive. And I realized that my life isn't going to be the same again. Starting today, and continuing for a long, long time, I will be a student. Hello, homework; goodbye, life!

I feel about going to college the same way I felt about moving to Germany: I am excited about the new opportunity, nervous about the unknown, and keenly aware that things will never be the same again. That's not to say they won't be good. But I hope I embrace the opportunity to further my education as easily and with as much zeal as I have embraced the incredible opportunity to live in Europe.

Stay tuned.

Moose and I went to a college football game at the University of Tennessee last weekend. It was a belated birthday gift for him and we had an absolute blast. And this former cheerleader was in her element. I LOVED seeing all the fans dressed up. There's nothing quite like football, bands and fans in the crisp, fall air. Nothing. FYI: old cheerleaders never die, we just let out the waistbands of our skirts. And we always know how to accessorize our outfits to show our S-P-I-R-I-T spirit (clap, clap). My orange eyelashes and T's were rockin! BEHOLD:
I know what you're thinking. But don't hate me because I'm beautiful. *snorts*

My mom was here this past week helping me get some things ready for our move and I was so glad to have her expertise since she's done this overseas thing a couple of times. (I recalled how bossy she was when I was growing up and knew she'd be good at keeping me on task, but I swear I think that little woman carries a whistle and a whip in her purse.) Kidding aside, we actually got several things done this week that previously felt overwhelming to me. Moving overseas is a whole different ball of wax than a stateside move, lemme tell ya. There's still so much more to be done, but I'll get there. Eventually.

The house was in decent shape when Mom got here, but now that the sorting, cleaning, clearing & purging has kicked into high gear, walking into the house reminds me of Waffle House hash browns because everything in here is scattered, smothered, or covered in one way or another.

 Peace in your 'hood, people.